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Monday, August 06, 2007

MTA bus-traumatic

IN: Self-help parenting books
OUT: Shaking babies

On Friday I helped a friend move some furniture out of his house. We rode the B38 MTA bus from Brooklyn Heights towards Clinton Hill. A baby was crying incessantly. My friend (who rides this bus daily) predicted that the next milestone would be when the mother gave the baby a big smack. Within five minutes of that statement, I heard a thundering ~thwap!~ that made me jump out of my seat. Of course, this didn't make the baby stop crying. I used to mock the ads instructing parents not to shake their babies...I am now thinking that I owe that ad agency a big donation.

Also on Friday, a 22-year-old man refused to give up his seat to the elderly, and the bus driver tried to rip him a new one.

Fast forward to this morning on the B61 bus. I watched as the bus driver twisted himself into a road rage so volatile that he began repeatedly thrusting his left hand into the window.

I think it's finally time to buy a Vespa. But will that mean I have to start listening to ska again?

Helium - Baby Vampire Made Me [mp3] Courtesy of Swan Fungus

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Thursday, August 02, 2007

The Wombats: If You're Not Listening To This, Stop Saying You Like Music


Up until a few months ago The Wombats were one of the best unsigned bands in the world. Now they can move on to being one of the best signed bands in the world. Sounding a little like a twitchier, male-fronted Long Blondes and boasting the greatest song about moving to New York called ... "Moving To New York, The Wombats are ready for prime-time. They also have a song called, "Patricia, The Stripper" which is about a girl named Patricia who is, you guessed it, a stripper. And a whore. They also have a song about going to a wedding of someone you've slept with and feeling torn about whether or not they are, or ever were, attractive. So, lyrically, they are ... ambitious.

You can check their new single, "Kill The Director" over at their myspace and if you're feeling sinister you can check them when they finally arrive in New York on August 15th. The Annex will probably never be the same and you get the double bonus of The Head Set as an opener. Sonically, think of it like seeing a less impressive version of The Strokes before seeing a catchier version of The Futureheads. Now THAT, my friends, is a New York rock show - derivative, loud, and, yes, entirely awesome. And when it comes to overseas bands, you can't miss them because sometimes they don't come again.


The Winter Kids came and haven't come back. The Mess Hall came and haven't returned. The Long Blondes might not be back until the second Clinton administration and now The Wombats are passing quickly through the States, so catch them before they melt back to Europe forever.

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Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Soundscan The Horizon

So today is Wednesday and in the record industry, major or minor, it means one thing: record sales figures. Soundscan reports fall into administrative offices around the country and they either confirm or deny the public's faith in the label and their bands. So here's where we stood today:

Our Top 10 is still dominated by artists that you would expect and almost certainly controlled by albums you don't own. But what about further down? What about the bands we write about and the bands that buzz-out blogs and sell out dark, downtown venues?

The Interpol record, Our Love To Admire struggled in the 50s and has moved just over 100,000 units in its first three weeks on the chart. This cannot be what Capitol records had in mind when it was shelling out blank-check style money that some sources say totaled in the multi-millions. With little hope for a second single beyond "Heinrich Maneuver," the album could be dead in the water and may end up selling around quarter-million albums. Which, if they hit that target exactly, at about 12 bucks per album would generate 3,000,000 dollars in revenue or roughly break even. Let's put it this way, little bands signing to major labels can either go really well (Decemberists, Death Cab) or really badly. Mostly, Interpol has been a Carlos D.isappointment.

The Spoon album Ga^5 for all it's good press and overall quality, hung on to the mid-50s as well. In a third full-week, it has sold more than 70,000 copies. Merge can hardly be disgusted with this result and sales for the album should dwarf all previous Britt Daniel projects (Gimmie Fiction ended up around 100,000 for the entire run). Not only that but Merge can generally start clearing profit after selling 25,000 albums. Something that major labels can't claim in a meaningful way until sales are north of ten-times that amount.

Still, it seems that everyone is talking about Spoon and the talking may not matter. Ga^5 will definitely be in Rolling Stone, Spin, Blender and even the hate-able Pitchforkmedia as one of the best albums of the year. And it is. It is one of the best records of the year.

Then explain to me why even the effervescent, if forgettable, Colbie Caillat out-sells them? And why she’ll keep doing it? She may end up in the half-million range when all is said and done. Maybe more. Her record isn't bad either, but it’s not jumping up any slam-dunk, year-end, got-to-get-this-shit-now lists. We’re dealing with a credible band in Spoon and what is maybe their master-work (Gaaaaaaaaaaaaa) and it’s about to get dogged by a chick with no previous records and an audible musical-debt to early Jason Mraz.

So Merge makes money and Spoon makes a very good living and Universal gets paid and Colbie Caillat gets her cute little voice on the iTunes “Free Single of the Week.” No one is really losing here. It just seems like a weird state of affairs. That which is critically acclaimed (and not in an annoying way) is worth empirically less than a digestible, little girl with a spelling-bee last name. So why does it seem frustrating or inequitable?

This is a country where Rascal Flatts sold more than 4 million records. Wake up and smell the irony.



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