In: Visit from the local PETA chapter
Forever Out: The study of evolution

A sixth-grader in Kansas, the last bastion of responsible public education in this country, was suspended from school this week after admitting he stabbed three ducks to death. With a pencil.

What does it say about school violence (or me, I guess) that the first thing I thought was "At least he didn't have a real weapon"?

(PS I'm turning this into the world's first ornithology/music blog. Next up: A 40,000-word post discussing the relative merits of Glen Frey and Don Henley. You've been warned.)