My time in Clearfield can be summed up in one word: Shitfest. It was an all out assault on my body. So much meat - so little vegetables. So many drinks - so little water. I'd go out to lunch every afternoon with a couple of friends, but the only places you can eat are bars. Every chicken salad follows the same formula - bed of lettuce, a few diced tomatoes, chicken, French fries and melted cheese. Don't get me wrong, its all gravy, but right now I'm feeling one chicken salad away from a heart attack. In any event here are the Top 10 moments of this year's Thanksgiving, (the moments I can remember and actually post without getting in trouble):

10. Watching Fade To Black at Matt's house with Evan and Trevor. Have you scene this documentary yet? It chronicles Jay-Z's final show at Madison Square Garden. One of the best concert films I've seen in quite a long time, and the behind the scenes footage used to tell the story of the life of a song is unreal. I'm a bit late on this one, but everyone should run to rent this film.

9. Trying to climb into bed with Bruce. When I drunk like I did on Wednesday night, its easy to see why I should stop drinking. We took so many tequila shots that a blackout was guaranteed. Bruce sleeps in my old room because mom can snore something fierce. At 4am on Thursday morning, I tried to climb into my old bed (not realizing I was instructed to crash in the guest room), where Bruce crashed. He threw me to the ground 5 or 6 times while I asked him to, "Just move over dude". At one point he tossed me to the ground, I hopped up and skyed over him to the other side of the bed. I'm lucky he didn't kick my ass.

8. Seeing Evan's Dad's band play at Legends. During the Wednesday debachery, we slipped from Buster's to Legends to catch some songs by Serious Jones that features Doc Horton on keys and backup vocals. Much to my delight, we entered the smoke filled basement to a cover of Rick Springfield's Jessie's Girl, but scene was a bit crazy. As I tried to dodge grinding old English teachers, I heard some Fountains of Wayne and Poison, but the rest just ran together as the tequila kept coming.

7. By Saturday night, I could walk into the most popular haunt, Busters, and the bartender would have a tequila shot and a Busch Light tallboy waiting for me. She'd finish this transaction by asking me if I wanted a straw. Brilliant.

6. Watching Notre Dame beat Stanford in the last minutes of the ballgame with Matt who was my Irish confidant back in the day. Jeanette, Kevin, Melissa and Evan joined us in the back of Dingers, but we were the only kids wearing the pride on our sleeves while a couple of rednecks sat behind us badmouthing the team.

5. Winning the Taboo championship at the Belin house. Mom and I destroyed Bruce and Chris. They are both appealing to the commissioners, but we believe in our win even with the cloud of uncertainty surrounding it.

4. Fighting with my friends. First it was Trevor and I in the snow out front of Busters. He banged me up pretty good. Don't mess with an Army man after you've tied one on. Then it was Brandon on the couches of the PR. You might know Brandon from his periodic visits over the years. We got into a nice little bitch fight that left me spitting up blood the next morning.

3. Bailing out on the first half of Saturday evening to check out Jarhead with my lil sister. A stop by the Ritz Twin is requisite to every visit home. This time left me a little disappointed as the sound was shit and the screen was unsteady. Pick up your shit or you won't be getting my $5 at Christmas time. The film was good, but it left me feeling extremely unsettled in regards to the war and what might be going on with Trevor. He has adjusted well, but that movie made me wonder.

2. The old school bro' down at the Practice Room on Thursday night. It was an all-star affair with Eddie Edmondson, Evan Emoson, Dr. Funk, Sticky Stan and a Slop Shop digital performance. Good looks.

1. Thanksgiving dinner with Mom, Chris, Bruce and Trevor. This year was a small affair, but it didn't stop us from grubbing a fantastic meal by Mom and Chris. I managed to carve my first turkey, Trevor kept the table entertained and we all took turns passing out on the couch for the entire afternoon.

Honorable Mention: Arguing with Nicole White about how awesome I was in High School. Catching up with Rachel at Busters. Beating Seabass and Bruce Wright at pool. Seeing the Denny's Beer Barrel Belly Buster in person. Meeting Eddie's son Taco, (who has a mohawk). Hearing that Janelle loves Cleveland. Hearing Adams tell me, "It's weird being on the other side," moments after realizing he is now a police officer. Jeanette persisting that I am gay because I barely looked at her tits. Nathan explaining how he is steps away from 100 notches. Spinning out in bad weather. Not going to Mojo's - not even once.

So that's it from the Pennsylvania front. Big thanks to everyone who drove me around and didn't beat me up. It was a lot of fun. Now we return to the grind and though I might not be ready for it, I welcome it with open arms. Don't forget to cruise down to the Mercury Lounge for The Cribs show this evening. The English trio hits at 9pm so don't be late. If you have tickets to The Magic Numbers show at the Bowery, don't worry, you can see both. Now someone bring me a salad.