Having a cold sucks with a miserable intensity unparallel to all other physical ailments. Pain is no big deal. If you get burned, break a bone or get punched in the face, you experience pain, but you know how to deal with it. When I get sick, I’m fucking helpless. Friends and family members often ask, “Did you take anything”. My answer is usually an affirmative “No”. What is my aversion to over the counter drugs? Well, it’s my contention that these drugs only mask the illness that’s plaguing my system. What could be wrong with that? You have to understand who you’re dealing with. If guys like me feel even the slightest bit of bodily placation, we’ll step up and push it to the limit. Unless I’m completely enraptured by an illness; vodka tonics will find a way into my belly. So I’m not some holistic hippy who believes nature has to run its course with the aid of various roots and tea, but rather I’m some stubborn asshole who thinks if I don’t let nature run its course then I’ll be sick forever.
Fuck. Sorry, I don’t know where this is going. A few days of substance free existence makes me think a little too much. As you can probably guess, I didn’t do a damn thing with my Wednesday night. Christie and I didn’t get to watch Anchorman. I didn’t get to say later on to Michelle over at 2A. Beach and Builder dined without me. And most importantly, I didn’t get to stop by Cheap Shots to say a big happy birthday to my big brother Nate Martin. It was a wasted evening. Thank god Kyle was present to keep me occupied. You got to love that kid.
What I’d like to do now is to give you a run down on some of the things I saw while channel surfing between the hours of 8:00 and 10:00pm. First I started on Fox who was airing an episode of That 70’s Show. A few questions come to mind. When did these kids grow up and have kids? Jackie dumped Hyde because he won’t marry her. Quit trying to tame the beast. Why the hell is that exchange student still in the country? We also watched a portion of some show where girls compete to be swimsuit models. Kyle knew a little too much about this show, but I shrugged it off and watched while jackass girls got emotional because some judge belittled the shape of their face. If any of those girls are looking to be consoled, then look no further. Then we stumbled upon 60 Minutes Wednesday where they were doing a socially poignant piece on the porn industries move into the world of publishing. Some of the interviews were hilarious. One publisher tried to justify a good story being a good story. Ahhh, America might be the only place coaxing Red States back to literature through the use of porn star biographies. There were other crappy sitcoms flooding the tube. John Goodman stars in some half hour puke-a-thon while Andy Richter and a cast of marginally talented youngsters brings new meaning to the word shitshow. The icing on my poorly layered cake was B.M.O.C. which is known to some of you as Big Man On Campus. This show is pure genius. Take one douchebag frat boy. Mix in a number of big titted, dumb witted co-eds and a bunch of challenges that give them the option to strip down to bikinis. Bake for one hour setting the oven to hot. By the time its finished college freshmen across the country will be scraping babies from their pants.
My mother often wonders why I go out so much. Well, right there is your reason. If sports. The O.C. or Arrested Development isn’t on, then prime time doesn’t mean a damn thing to me.
Jinners just dropped me a line to let me know that TV on the Radio is playing a not-so-secret show at Trash Bar tonight. I’m sure it will be packed. I’m sure it will be hot. I’m sure it will be the place to be. I’m sure I’ll be home on the couch. If you want to get in, it’s probably best you go mega early.
*** Do you like Brendan Benson? I know Mia does. Here are some details on his upcoming release.
*** Do these guys ever take a break? Maybe Noah and DTL are just cracking the whip. Either way, get set for more Modest Mouse dates. Hopefully they’ll grace crowds with some set variations.
*** Films are good. Films are goooood. Check out the A.V. Club’s recap of 2004.
*** Where’s the Beef? Apparently we’re surrounded by it. This one’s for Noah.
*** PopMatters gives a brief recap of 2004’s best live experiences.
*** Talk about emo, (thanks Allie)! Wow, now I can’t wait to be old and lonely.
*** Some new music is on the way. Adam Green is hitting us in February while the Hot Hot Heat hope to warm things up in April. You can check out the latter in this studio clip of Island of The Honest Man.
*** Hey Dickheads!!! What about NYC?
*** In breaking news: Red States hate homosexuals. Sorry Oliver if it isn’t Gladiator, it won’t fly. I hate it when filmmakers try to portray the truth.
*** And finally, I know this has been said before, but why did it take me so long to figure out Built to Spill kicks so much ass?
9 Comments:
JJJay whats goin down??,,,,question do you know what the deal is with the tickets for DFA 79 at Mercury lounge on the 27th......??? Your help would be greatly appretiated....
yours truly,
culkin sense aka Shady Stephen
trail of dead are sooo over nyc. haha.
They will never be over NYC, not as long as i can help it.
Stephen, as of now, they aren't doing a presale for that show. It will be day of. If I hear otherwise I'll drop you a line
Thanks Anonymous......can you please tell JJJay I will be more then willing to come over and play chips n dip with him on the couch.......Stephen....And if you love em' let them knooooowwwww....
Hey Jay,
do you if us common folk can get into the Trail of dead show at rothko???
oh I fogot to add the word "know"...my bad
i don't know what its for or why they are having it (i'm sure its to showcase the new stuff). I'm not certain how to get in, if i catch wind, i'll let you know. i have to get miself in or i'll go nuts.
Thanks JJJay, next time I see you I'll have to buy you a drink for all the knowledge you bless us with....or I'll just give you a culkin which ever one tickles your fancy...
a culkin would do me fine.
you should start making friends with interscope kids. this show looks like it will be a tough one. if you can't hit that up, sea ray is playing their last show ever at mercury with some solid openers. should be a good night.
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